Mommy Brain and Situation Organization

I know I’m not the first nor will I be the last to experience the amazing and sometime debilitating condition known as ” mommy brain”. I swear at 26 I feel like I have the mind of a slow kindergartner or someone with a touch of dementia; I didn’t used to be this way. Before having children my mind and memorization skills were impeccable, I have this natural knack for memorizing numbers but last week as I was making the final calls to invite people to my daughters birthday party i found myself struggling to remember my aunts phone number that has been the same since I was a kid! And now it hasn’t just been phone numbers, I can leave one room totally intents on getting something in another but once I reach the destination in my house I can’t even remember what it was that I went in there for in the first place. Crazy huh?? To combat my mommy brain I’ve managed to develop some kind of a system to keep me on track with remembering things. My little world is comprised of a day planner, my iPad, my iPhone, and a pad of sticky notes. Honestly if it weren’t for these items i would be totally lost and remembering basic things like doctors appointments would not happen.

So do any of y’all experience “mommy brain”? How do you stay organized??

Bitch better have my 300 sammiches!!!!

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A beautiful New York City woman is either preparing the most exquisite, slow-burn revenge murder of all time or has lost her goddamn mind, the New York Post reports.

Actually, the woman herself reports: Post writer Stephanie Smith has revealed herself—proudly—as the deranged mind behind 300sandwiches.com, a website on which the blogger details her efforts to make her boyfriend 300 sandwiches, so that he will deem her worthy of making his sandwiches for the rest of her life (by proposing to her). It is a modern A Vindication of the Rights of Woman, with added sandwich photos, without the rights of woman.

“My boyfriend, Eric, is the gourmet cook in our relationship,” the article opens,

but he’d always want me to make him a sandwich.

Each morning, he would ask, “Honey, how long you have been awake?”

“About 15 minutes,” I’d reply.

“You’ve been up for 15 minutes and you haven’t made me a sandwich?”
We learn that, to Stephanie Smith’s boyfriend Eric (whom she describes as “an Alexander Skarsgård look-alike” and who, it must be said, bears a passing resemblance to True Blood’s “Eric” [Season 1, hair only]), sandwiches are “like kisses or hugs. Or sex,” perhaps in the sense that they are something he demands a woman submit to him nightly before he gives her a diamond.

We learn that the couple moved in together one year ago, settling into “a sleek place in Brooklyn” that would soon, by God, be filled with Stephanie’s homemade sandwiches, else she planned to die a spinster.

We learn that Eric exclaims things like “Babes!”

Eric devoured the sandwich as if it were a five-star meal, diving in with large, eager bites. “Babes, this is delicious!” he exclaimed.
Not long after that exclamation, Eric exclaims again:

“Honey, you’re 300 sandwiches away from an engagement ring!”
The story is like something out of a fairytale, one of those weird old German ones you can’t read to kids, where an peasant girl’s stepmother forces her to make 300 sandwiches for the Devil, and then a series of horrible things happen to the girl, and at the end of the story she freezes to death.

It’s never exactly clear whether the mission Stephanie undertakes is a conscious attempt to satirize something (…women?), or just another testament in God’s endless troll against the race of man. At times, the website simply reads like an inflammatory text devised to anger sandwiches. (“Spread avocado on toast. Slice eggs, then layer on top of avocado.” HMM, OK.)

She calculates that, if she makes Eric three sandwiches a week, every week, until the Apocalypse, by the time she finishes the challenge she will be “deep into” her thirties. Perhaps by then the movie version of this story, which Stephanie’s Dear Diary-style blog posts obviously anticipate (“Instead, I am probably the only fool that cried after pole dancing class,” she writes, above a recipe for Sloppy Joes), will be in pre-production.

So, yes. Stephanie is game for the 300 sandwich challenge! What the hell else is she doing? (Writing for the Post?) Not getting married, that’s for sure.

“”Maybe I needed to show him I could cook to prove that I am wife material. If he wanted 300 sandwiches, I’d give him 300 sandwiches — and I’d blog about it.

I bought the 300sandwiches.com domain name and a Nikon DSLR.
As Stephanie sets about achieving her life’s greatest legacy (making many, many sandwiches), she suffers under the withering common sense of her friends, who call her a “Stepford Wife” and decry Eric’s mumbled non-proposal as “chauvinistic.” Stephanie addresses these criticisms with an agile, erudite argument, or, anyway, she would if she weren’t so busy making sandwiches!!!

My own mother was doubtful. “Honey, can you even cook?” she asked.
She can’t! But everyone—who lives in her apartment or who is a commodities trader with all his money in sandwich futures—is rooting for her!””

But the piece soon takes a darker tone. A few dozen sandwiches in, SANDWICHES!!!! stops being something Stephanie does for love and starts being something she does to avoid the vicious tongue-lashings of her stepmother boyfriend.

“”I made sandwiches to get myself out of the doghouse — like No. 67, a scrambled egg, smoked salmon and chive creation that combined some of Eric’s favorite things to make up for my being 45 minutes late for dinner the night before.

Even after covering movie premieres or concerts for Page Six, I found myself stumbling into the kitchen to make Eric a sandwich while I still had on my high heels and party dress.””

Those lines aren’t a prelude to the triumphant part of the story where Stephanie prepares Eric a special sandwich consisting of a box jellyfish on a bed of oleander leaves with hemlock garnish—a sandwich which, Stephanie will later testify, she had no idea would poison Eric so swiftly he would expire where he sat (though her browser history will suggest otherwise). They’re just part of the narrative of Sandwich’s charming life. I mean Stephanie’s.

To date, Stephanie has made 176 sandwiches, which means she only has 124 more until the Goblin King will accept her as his wretched bride. For now, all her eager public can do is speculate about what will happen on the evening of sandwich 299.

Will Eric reveal that this challenge was devised as a brain teaser, to see if Stephanie could get a job at Google? (A: On day one, prepare a giant PB&J, and then cut it into 300 pieces.) Will Stephanie awake in the night and, using her serrated bread knife, slice Eric’s body to pieces, for use as the meat in the 300 sandwiches she will serve at his memorial service? (“Looks like I finally made him 300 sandwiches!” she will shriek to the night.) Will Stephanie be disqualified from the competition on a technicality since, Eric will point out, “air sandwich” (two pieces of bread served with nothing; sandwich #298) does not really qualify as a sandwich? Who can say?

Maybe they’ll just end up getting married. The rest of Stephanie’s life surely cannot be any more degrading than this.

“Sour Patch Grapes”

1 pound of green seedless grapes, pulled from the stems and rinsed
1 3-oz. package of Melon Fusion Jell-O (NOT prepared)
Water
Directions

Rinse the grapes under water until all are clean and wet. Spread the gelatin mix on a plate, about 1/3 at a time. Place a handful of grapes on the plate and gently roll each grape in the gelatin powder until it is covered. Place the coated grapes into a bowl and repeat the process with the remaining ingredients until all of the grapes are covered. Place the bowl and let set in the refrigerator for at least 1 hour, until the gelatin is set. The colder these are, the better they taste!

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Product Review: GlamGlow Face masks (Facial in a jar???)

There I was, minding my own business in Sephora when my eyes happen to fall upon some products I hadn’t seen there before. The moment I saw them I was filled with excitement. I’m not sure where, but I’d heard of Glam Glow products before and the reviews were phenomenal. I picked up the two boxes (one black one white) and immediately began reading to learn more of the benefits and ingredients.

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I have to start by saying that I already have quite a few clay-based masks in my possession. Queen Helene Mint Julep, Aztec Clay, and my Fresh Umbrian Clay Bar. So why would I buy two more?

Based on what I read on those boxes these masks seemed far superior to my current line up. Why? Because they seemed to preform multiple roles. It’s almost like a BB Creme of clay masks. For example, the Youth Mud Tinglexfoliate Treatment (black jar) boasts of the following ingredients:

– GreenTea Leaves {Brightens complexion+ Balances oil+Protects against free radicals+Hydrates}
-Volcanic Pumic Rock {Multi Level micro exfoliation that you control}
-French Sea Clay {Absorbs impurities & toxic substances}
-Volcanic Minerals {Detoxifies +Awakens skin with increase in circulation}
-Ivy {Tightens & lifts with extended benefits}
-Cucumber {Anti inflammatory + Helps heal + Soothes and calms skin}
-Comfrey Herb {Creates younger looking complexion +Speeds cell regeneration}
-Lavendar {Helps heal breakouts + Natural anti bacterial + Anti inflammatory}
-Chamomile & Marigold Flower {Fights skin issues + Antimicrobal}

How in the world does someone put a product back on the shelves with such wonderful properties? I could not resist. It’s designed to be a “10 minute anti-aging facial in a jar” used behind the scenes in Hollywood for immediate camera ready skin. That is what really sealed the deal for me. I wanted a mask I could use in “emergency situations” like social events, or if my skin was misbehaving.

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Then I checked out what the Super Mud Clearing Treatment had to offer.

It has Acnecidic-6 which is a 4.4% blend of six acids including Alpha Hydroxy & Beta Hydroxy acids perfectly pH balanced to deal with damaged skin, declog and minimize pores, pigmentation, scarring, and breakouts. There’s also activated charcoal which is a high absorption carbon, attracting toxic substances into it’s mass up to 500 times it’s volume. It also has other yummy ingredients like mandelic & glycolic acid to help fade scars, salicylic acid to help treat active breakouts, eucalyptus leaves, aloe and so much more.

I had a decision to make. Which one should I buy? Of course you all know how the story ends. I have absolutely zero regrets over my indecisiveness. Both of them are like children. They’re different but I love them both equally. The biggest difference between the two, that I noticed, is the Youth Mud is highly textured. There are actual leaves in the mix and you can feel the small pieces of pumice. It takes your skin through a beautifying roller coaster. First you notice the raw ingredients as you apply, then ,as the mask dries, you begin to feel a light/mild tingle. Finally, as you rinse off, you realize how gritty and exfoliating it is for the skin. When you’re all done, you are left with a beautiful glow from the entire experience. The Super Mud has one job that it does really well…enter pores and detoxify.

It’s been a couple of days and I’ve used both once or twice. I’m not ashamed to say that I’m in love. One thing I’ll also mention is that I also picked up new Clarisonic brushes in the “deep pore cleaning” instead of the acne brush head which is more sensitive. The combination of the firmer brush and these amazing masks has officially blown my mind. My pores are way less visible and the minor breakouts I had shrunk up and went on their merry little way. These masks are pricey (putting it mildly) but I found them on Amazon for much, much less than retail.

My ultimate goal is to create perfectly flawless skin and these babies bring me one step closer.

Oven baked tacos!!!!

A favorite meal of my children is tacos, they enjoy Taco Tuesdays and since tacos can be a bit messy with little ones I thought of this recipe with my 4 year old in mind. By baking them and allowing the cheese to melt in the shell helps to keep everything in the shell and minimizes the mess….enjoy!

Xoxo
Dee

2 lbs ground beef (or turkey/chicken)
1 small onion diced
1 small can diced green chilies
1 recipe for Homemade taco seasoning (below)
1 (8 ounce) can low sodium tomato sauce
1 (16 ounce) can fat free refried beans
2 cups shredded reduced fat Colby-jack cheese
18-20 hard taco shells {if gluten free, be sure they are}

Optional Condiments-
Lettuce (shredded)
Tomato (diced)
Salsa
Guacamole
Sour Cream
Olives, sliced

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.

In a large skillet brown ground beef and onion over medium-high heat. Drain off any excess liquid. Return to pan, add chilies, refried beans, tomato sauce, and taco seasoning. Mix well and cook for a few minutes if mixture seems runny.

Spoon the taco meat mixture into the taco shells and place into a 9 x 13 inch baking dish (OR check out The Taco Rack), standing up. Sprinkle cheese over the top of the taco meat in each shell. Place into the oven and bake at 400 degrees for 10-12 minutes or until the cheese has melted and the tacos are heated through.
Remove from the oven and top with any optional condiments for serving.

Taco Seasoning
1 tablespoon chili powder
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon onion powder
1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
1/4 teaspoon dried oregano
1/2 teaspoon paprika
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
1 teaspoon sea salt
1 teaspoon black pepper

In a small bowl, mix all together. Store in an airtight container.
I used all of this on 2 lbs of ground meat with a little water mixed in.

The Best Damn Chicken Enchiladas Ever!

Okay, so since I’ve been getting great responses from my previous food post I’m adding another to the collection for y’all to try! Now I’m such an enchilada fan, I looooooooove the sour cream sauce at Gringo’s for the longest I’ve been tweaking my sauce recipe and I’veImage finally perfected it, now time to share with the masses. I made a big batch on Tuesday (18) and the pan was cleared by kids and nieces and nephew;i hope all of you love it as much as they did.

 

xoxo

Dee

 

3 Tbl. unsalted butter

 

3 Tbl. flour

 

1 (14.5 oz.) can low-sodium chicken broth

 

1 c. sour cream

 

1/4 – 1/2 c. green salsa, depending on how spicy you want it

 

    or 1 (4 oz.) can diced green chiles

 

 

 

rotisserie chicken, shredded

 

    or season a few chicken breasts with taco seasoning

 

    and bake until done, then shred

 

2-3 c. Monterey Jack cheese, shredded
8-10 corn or flour tortillas

 

chopped cilantro, onions

 

 

For the enchilada sauce: melt butter over medium heat in a large skillet.  Whisk in the flour, one Tablespoon at a time, to prevent lumps from forming.  Cook a minute or two to cook off the flour taste, stirring occasionally.  Gradually whisk in the chicken broth and whisk until smooth.  Continue cooking until thickened, about 5-10 minutes, stirring occasionally.  Once it reaches desired thickness, remove from heat and stir in the sour cream and green salsa; set aside.  Heat tortillas for 10-15 seconds in the microwave until pliable.  Divide shredded chicken between tortillas, top each with a little bit of cheese and cilantro.  Roll up and place seam-side down in a 9×13-inch  pan.  Cover with the enchilada sauce and top with remaining cheese.  Bake at 350 degrees for 25 minutes or until bubbly.  Broil for a minute or two at the end if you want the cheese to brown. 

 

If you don’t have a taco seasoning pack on hand use salt, pepper, chili powder and fresh garlic.

Breakfast! Green Chile Egg Casserole

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This awesome concoction was created by me this morning and my kids loved it! I thought I’d share with all of you…enjoy!

Xoxo

Dee

Here’s the recipe:

-6 eggs

-1/2 small container of sour cream (we used the Light kind)

-1 small can of diced green chiles

-1 cup shredded cheese of your choice (I had raw organic cheddar on hand so I threw that in there)

-garlic powder, salt and pepper

1. Spray a small casserole dish with nonstick spray and preheat the oven 350*.

2. Beat eggs in a bowl and mix in the sour cream mixture

3. Evenly spread out the green chiles on the dish and then top with the cheese. Pour egg and cheese mixture on top.

4. Bake for 30 minutes until cooked through and lightly browned.

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